Still Going Strong

In my second week of rehab, and other than the waking up at 630 am to get there at 7, I'm really enjoying it. It's nice to have a support team on getting better. I'm actually liking the exercise too, I'm starting to feel like I have more energy.

I haven't dropped many more pounds as far as the scale goes, but I think I am seeing some differences in how things are fitting. People are saying my face looks thinner. Who knows, but its always nice to hear!

I really really really love the app myfitnesspal. You can use it on your phone, ipad, or online. I use it on all three! It makes it really easy to keep track of what you are eating and your exercise and it feels good to log on and see positive comments and progress. It has almost every food pre-programmed so it is so easy to look up food before I go out to eat and check it all.

The best thing about it, is that it helps me see the whole picture. I am finding it so frustrating to eat healthy at times, because even though things are advertised as healthy, I am finding they are not. They may be low in calories or fat, but then they are high in sugars, cholesterol, sodium, and all the other things I have to watch. So, even in the grocery store, I'm having to look at the whole package when they say something is healthy or light.

I have found some foods out I really like. Applebee's has a new menu item on the weight watchers menu, the creamy Parmesan chicken and it was delicious! I think breakfast has been the easiest to substitute healthy things for since I can get egg substitute or egg whites.

I'm finally getting to the point where I am not constantly craving junk. We got chinese food at work yesterday, and I barely ate any, but I still felt gross after eating it from the grease and the guilt. :)

This weekend I am speaking at the St. Mary's Butterfly Ball about my experience there. I am kind of nervous but also looking forward to it. I found a new dress and Jason got fitted for his tuxedo. We don't have many occasions to dress up for. My work has a table so there will be friends there to support me and I'm happy about that.

Wish me luck!

Rehab

Today was my first day of rehab! I was actually pretty excited to go because I am ready to start working out and losing weight.

I was probably a good twenty plus years younger than every person in there. Everyone was very friendly and I got lots of hmmmm looks from the other patients. There was one woman who was new too and she had a big scar on her chest, so I can't even imagine what she just went through and am very thankful mine was not that bad!

I felt really good the whole time. My blood pressure stayed good. They start you off with stretches, and some with weights. Then I did ten minutes on the exercise bike, ten minutes on the treadmill, and 6 minutes on a climber thing. They add two minutes a day until you reach twenty on the bike and treadmill and 10 on the climber. I felt good the whole time, like I probably could have worked out a little bit harder and been okay.

This morning I had breakfast out with my dad at Bob Evans. At restaurants, I've been getting egg substitute and fruit, etc... It was pretty yummy. Mexican food is what I miss most. I used to eat it at least once a week at restaurants. My favorite is cheesy nachos, or a steak burrito covered in white cheese sauce. This weekend, I was really craving it, so I had some. Instead of beef, I got a chicken taco and actually ate lettuce on it, it was actually really good and fulfilled my craving. Still a higher sodium and not great meal, but on a rare occasion, a good way to make a slightly healthier decision!

Ten pounds done...lots to go!!!

Good Check Up

Well I went back to work this week and today was my first day off.

It was nice to get out of the house and be around everybody again. Especially for Valentine's Day. i like watching all the men pick out gifts for their significant others! I had a nice Valentine's Day myself. Jason bought me the perfume I had been wanting and we went and got 54th Street to go. I got the chicken and rice platter with veggies. It was really pretty yummy. It was on their healthy dining menu and I just requested it with no additional salt.

I got pretty tired of cereal for breakfast this week. One morning I got a plain egg mcmuffin from McDonald's which was on my healthier list. It was pretty yummy. Not quite as good as the egg and cheese biscuit I used to get, but a good healthier substitute.

I have brought my lunch to work every day this week which for me is a huge accomplishment! Jason and I are really bad about eating leftovers normally, so I have been making lunches out of them. One night this week I made a really yummy chicken recipe with honey and teriyaki sauce. It was really good if you like sweet stuff.

Had my first follow up with the cardiologist this morning and everything was good. They did an EKG and everything went good. She said that I can start returning to normal life as much as I feel like I can. They will do another echo to look at my heart in a few months and I will do some bloodwork to see how the medicines are effecting my organs.

Monday I will start cardiac rehab. I am actually kind of looking forward to it. I am ready to lose weight and feel better and really see results. I think this is a great way to get started. Especially since I want to get in the habit of exercising before work, this will have me getting up early (have to be there at 7) and get started. I will do that three times a week for 6-8 weeks.

This week I have done some minor exercising. We got an exercise bike from my parents (thanks Mom & Dad!), so I started out with 15 minutes and have been working my way up. Today was so beautiful outside, so Sandi and I went on a walk so we could both get a little exercise. Now she is passed out. :)

That is all to report for now. Again, thank you to my wonderful friends and family for being so supportive and making me feel so good and positive about making lifestyle changes!

Thank You

Thank you to everyone for their overwhelmingly positive response to me writing about my journey. It gives me a lot of encouragement and makes me feel like I can really do this!

I need to also say thank you to my amazing friends and family who have been there for me for the past week. I feel so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life who care so much about me. I am a very lucky girl in lots of ways.

I am getting a little bored at home, I will definitely be ready to go back to work on Monday and get out and about. Jason and I ran a quick errand to Walgreens the other night, and then we stopped and got some dinner. My first meal out! I was able to pull up the menu from chic-fil-a on my phone before we went and figure out a healthy option. So, I had a plain grilled chicken sandwich and a fruit cup. The sandwich is nothing I will be running back for, but it was okay. Boy did I want to rip Jason's french fries out of his hand!

Yesterday, Jason's step-mom, Barb, brought us a pork roast, (Thank you!). So last night's dinner I think was my favorite so far. We had the roast, a small baked potato, and green beans. It was yummy. Luckily, I have leftovers! I went through a bunch of recipe books that I have from weight watchers and other things and marked recipes to try, so soon there will be a trip to the grocery store.

So far, I have lost 8.5 lbs, probably mostly from being in the hospital, but hey we are on the way. I'm feeling pretty good overall. The wound where they went in to do the cath is sore, and my back is hurting from laying around so much.

And just for smiles...here is Sandi, she has been taking good care of Mommy!

Journey from a broken heart

My name is Carly. I am twenty-five years old and live in the Kansas City area. I like to think that I lead a pretty typical twenty-something lifestyle. I work in a jewelry store and handle a lot of the marketing and web stuff as well as work customer service. I have been with my boyfriend Jason, for about 4 and a half years and we live together with our dog Sandi.

I love to read, write, see movies, listen to music, and spend lots of time socializing with friends and family.

I also love food. I have felt like it controlled a portion of my life for a long time now. We joke at work that our most difficult decision of the day is deciding what to eat for lunch.

On February 3, 2012, my entire life was changed when I had a heart attack.

Here is my story...

When i was around 13, I was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome and insulin resistance. I was warned that this would increase my chances of heart disease and I needed to eat healthy and exercise to prevent further problems from these diseases. For a (short) while, I tried to eat healthy and lead a healthy lifestyle, but being a teenager took over. Even though I almost felt guilty after eating, I ate what I wanted, and rarely exercised. All of my friends and family have always teased about my love of chicken fingers. I ordered them almost everywhere I went, (Longhorn has the best in my opinion, I was in fact a connoisseur of chicken fingers) and we ate out a lot!

I often thought and worried about my health and as I got older, developed a lot of anxiety with my worries. However, food always won. After some meals, I would feel guilty and worry myself sick with anxiety about what could happen to me.

I have a family history filled with heart disease. My grandfather has had a stent put in, my grandmother triple bypass surgery. My Mom had a stent put it about six years ago, my uncle passed away from heart disease, and my grandmother on my father's side had a heart attack just a few weeks before me.

Knowing all of this only increased my anxiety. I hate thinking about it. I don't like medical shows, ignore billboards and ads for health related things, and hate hearing about anything medical related. Several years ago, I attended a Go Red for Women event while working at Macy's. The speaker was a young woman who had experienced either a heart attack or stroke, and I actually found an excuse to get up and leave during her speech because it scared me so much.

Despite all of this, and my constant worrying, like I said, food always won. I was even scared to exercise (or so I told myself), but I couldn't seem to get a grip on my life and weight. I refuse to share my feelings with anyone and would blow off my mother every time she expressed worry or concern about my lifestyle.

I think for awhile I have known that something was not right, but was always too scared to bring it up to a doctor, for the fact that they might confirm my suspicions. I would occasionally experience chest pain, but it was fleeting and quick and I would always attribute it to anxiety or stress. I had an excuse for anything I ever felt. I would tire quickly, and could sleep in well past my alarm on a daily basis (I don't even have to be at work until 9:30). There were several times I got overheated to the point of feeling like I was going to pass out. I was always embarrassed when these attacks occurred but attributed them once again to anxiety. The anxiety is not gone, but I think once I continue on my heart health journey, I will see how many of these things were probably more related to being unhealthy.

I was always thinking about what I was going to eat next. When I was alone, I could go and get whatever takeout I wanted. I ate out numerous times a week whether socializing with a friend, or grabbing food for my boyfriend and I because I didn't want to cook. Every meal had to be delicious, had to be what I was craving.

So, on Friday, February 3, 2012, it all came crashing down. As the doctor put it, the bomb went off.

Thursday night, I attended a comedy show at the Sprint Center (Jeff Dunham was hilarious). I got home shortly before midnight and felt like I had an upset stomach. I went to bed and fell asleep quickly. Around 2:00AM I woke up feeling like I was going to be sick. As soon as I got up anxiety hit. I was hot from head to toe and felt like my legs were turning to jelly. I jumped back in bed and woke up my boyfriend, who got my some cold towels for my head. I calmed down shortly and fell back asleep. I woke up again about 4:00am this time with a blinding pain in between my shoulder blades. It hurt through to my chest and I began freaking out. I woke Jason up who told me to breathe and try to relax. He rubbed my back for me, but no matter what he did it continued to hurt no matter where I laid. I thought I was having bad indigestion so I took an acid pill and some ibuprofen. I gave myself 15 minutes to see if the pain relaxed then I was going to go to the hospital. One hour later, I was still in pain. I kept thinking it would go away but it didn't. Poor Jason was rubbing my back and doing whatever he could to ease my pain. For a brief moment, I thought I was feeling better and decided to shower for work. By the end of the shower, I was in enough pain I knew I had to go to the hospital.

Jason took me to the ER, even when I got there, I almost had him turn around and take me home. But I thought, no I am here. I am sure I am fine, but it won't hurt to have a doctor tell me so. They took their time getting me to a room and then a doctor came and saw me. I explained my symptoms and he told me it was most likely muscular pain from sleeping weird but since I was there they would give me an EKG. The nurse came in with vicodin and immediately after swallowing I began vomiting. Jason thought for sure after that I would feel better and that everything was okay.

Then they did the EKG....

The EKG technician, definitely could have used a better poker face. After doing the EKG she looked like she was going to cry. She ran out of the room and I heard a doctor tell her to do another one in ten minutes. Apparently, they decided that was not going to work. I was immediately moved closer to the nurse's station and they began hooking me up to all kinds of monitors. They put a defibrillator in my bed and I started to panic. Luckily, I had Jason by my side, but I told him he better get my mommy there now! They told me I was having a heart attack and needed to get me to a cath lab as quickly as possible. I was wheeled to do a MRI and immediately to the Cath lab. My Mom got there, right before I went in and that was the only time I cried. I didn't have enough time to think of all the options.

The nurses and doctors were great. I was awake the entire time, although they did give me a "cocktail" to calm me down. :) I laid on the table, for I don't know how long, just praying that God would let me make it through and to recover from this. I spent the next day and a half in the icu, was moved to a regular room, and released on Sunday.

My heart attack was caused by a 50% blockage in my right coronary artery. The plaque actually burst, and had I not gone to the hospital, could have continued to burst, which could have caused my artery to burst. I now have two stents in that artery. Luckily, there was no damage to my heart muscle from the attack.

So, since the bomb went off, I have a lot of lifestyle changes to make. Diet, exercise, and staying healthy. I am on a restricted diet and will attend a cardiac rehab to begin exercising and losing weight. God gave me exactly needed to shake out of my food addiction and change my life.

All I want to do is live. I want to marry my boyfriend, buy a house, raise a family someday, and live a long healthy life. That is winning out over anything I could eat.

I will continue to post about my difficulties in changing, I know it is a long road ahead. Part of me feels ashamed that I let my life get to the point of this happening, and is embarrassed to talk about my struggles with weight and food. At the same time, if I can help even 1 person and let people realize that we are never too young and to pay attention to your body, then its worth it. It happened, and now all I can do is change.

Don't ever ignore your gut or your symptoms. Finally paying attention saved my life, and probably could have been prevented even earlier.

So the journey to fix a broken heart begins...